If you can keep your head when all about you are losing theirs,
maybe you just don't understand the situation.

Mencken's Metalaw:
  For every human problem, there is a neat, simple solution;
  and it is always wrong.

Sevareid's Law:
  The chief cause of problems is solutions.

Thoreau's Law:
  If you see a man approaching you with the obvious intention
  of doing you good, you should run for your life.

Peer's Law:
  The solution to the problem changes the problem.

Lyall's Conjecture:
  If a computer cable has one end, then it has another.

Lyall's Fundamental Observation:
  The most important leg of a three legged stool
  is the one that's missing.

Pournelle's Law of Costs and Schedules:
  Everything costs more and takes longer.

Klipstein's Lament:
  All warranty and guarantee clauses are voided
  by payment of the invoice.

Klipstein's Observation:
  Any product cut to length will be too short.

Sueker's Note:
  If you need n items of anything, you will have n - 1 in stock.

Rosenfield's Regret:
  The most delicate component will be dropped.

.de la Lastra's Law:
.  After the last of 16 mounting screws has been removed
.  from an access cover, it will be discovered that the wrong
.  access cover has been removed.
.
.de la Lastra's Corollary:
.  After an access cover has been secured by 16 hold-down screws,
.  it will be discovered that the gasket has been ommitted.

Design flaws travel in groups.

You can't fight the law of conservation of energy
but you sure can bargain with it.

Gerrold's Fundamental Truth:
  It's a good thing money can't buy happiness.